Tired Tuesday: Did You Know, I Love to Flow?

Some of you may be familiar with different types of poetry.  I grew up a dramatic melodramatic girl, writing poetry–of all kinds.  Because, when I wasn’t day dreaming that I was the love child of Jimi Hendrix (how cool am I if I am???), I was the descendent of Edgar Allan Poe, or John Keats, or Pablo Neruda… Or I would have been the BFF of Sylvia Plath… I TOLD YOU MELODRAMATIC!!!

Where I grew up, and for the most part, where I went to college, poetry had rhythm.  It rhymed (sometimes), it could be measured (most of the time) or it was free form.  Until I began to teach, I had no idea that poetry could be FLOETRY.  Or slam.

Most of my teaching experience is in urban education.  Lower socio-economic standing, mostly students of color, the deepest, most richly worded, talented and brilliant minds I ever met were in these schools.  My students introduced me to flow.  They encouraged me to slam.  It was a way to share who I was in a raw, organic form.

And now, on this tired Tuesday on which I’ve given nebulizer treatments, gone on doctor visits and picked up steroid scripts, I feel exhausted–and apparently uninhibited enough to share this with you.

I wrote this about two years ago.  I hope you don’t mind that I share my past with you.  Sometimes, it helps me heal.  It helps me close doors.  And in this case, it is also opening a window into my soul.

Heart Burning Emptiness’ Echoes

Heart burning emptiness’ echoes

Hollow spaces in cavernous places lost long ago

Innocence

lost long ago

Passion

lost long ago

Even though I ask I guess I’ll never know

What moves your mountains and parts your seas

What emotions and touches bring you to your knees

And love sick

Desperate for movement from you

I drop to my knees, thinking yes, I know this will please

Never your tease, I always aim to ease

Easily takin the bones you throw

Never complainin bout how low I will go

To fill the depths of dark lovely things within

You swim the shallow end

I am lookin for a man interested in deep sea divin

Your toe sits at edge of pool, afraid of possible shivers up spine

But I don’t know why when the temp is mine and

…I run hot

But I allow you to make a fool of me

Waitin for days that might never come

Days away

You don’t look in my eyes but with

Lack of touch and louder than words you send me a message

I was a mistake

And your eyes are focused on hindsight

Maybe at end of tunnel you see light

But I see dark

I see lonely and tears and one

All along I have been fallin

And you have been trippin

But now pain is risin

It is dull but it throbs from deep within

We made love but it is just an action

And you don’t possess the emotion

You are lying to either me

Or you

I wish I had the strength to do

What needs to be done but I don’t

I carry on with life

Sometimes it hurts to breath

I can’t stand to breath

I don’t want to breath

But I am breathing, my heart is beating

For three now

And half of my two are part of you

My tears release my pain, the pain of my love

But I am filled with so much love

That I fear I may never stop crying until

I am swimming…or drowning

In this salty body

***If ten people read this and request me to, I will record this and post the audio clip of how this sounds performed…TEN PEOPLE…which, of course, I say ten because I am sure ten separate and different people don’t even read this little bloggy***

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~ by The Mommy Tsunami on August 11, 2009.

8 Responses to “Tired Tuesday: Did You Know, I Love to Flow?”

  1. I will be the first requester (requestee?)

  2. Very nice flow girl.
    And I…will also request. 🙂

  3. that makes me #3… 7 more to go 🙂

  4. count me on the list of 10! i LOVE it. you are awesome.

  5. Beautiful, I would love to “hear” it also.

  6. I think it sounded pretty well in my head but I’d rather hear it from you – makes me #5

  7. i’m seven

  8. Eight.

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